Monday 30 November 2009

The true story of Santa Claus


Santa Claus is real. And this is his true story.

Born nearly 2000 years ago, not too long after the days that Jesus Christ walked the earth, Nicholas was born to wealthy parents in a tiny village in the country we today call Turkey.

Though Nicholas was a child of privilege, he was raised a Christian and at a very young age was devoted to the faith.

Nicholas' parents died while he was yet a boy. And not knowing what to do with himself or the fortune he inherited, he turned to his Bible and read the words of admonishment that Christ gave to a wealthy man: "Sell all thou hath and give it to the poor and follow me".

Nicholas went to his village priest, confessed his sins and expressed the desires of his heart. He wished to become a priest.

Because he was an orphan, the priest took him in. And soon he found that Nicholas was no ordinary boy. Legend tells the story of a young Nicholas visiting the Holy Land with his village priest. On the return voyage, over stormy waters, their ship was cast about and all aboard feared for their lives. Nicholas steadfastly prayed for the safety of the passengers and crew. His faith astonished those with him as the storm passed and the waters calmed.

The village priest was fond of Nicholas. But he knew Nicholas lacked the education and the credentials necessary to become a priest. He would need a miracle if it was to happen. And a miracle is just what he got.

In the not too distant city of Myra, the Bishop of the church passed away. As the authorities of the church assembled to consider his replacement, Nicholas was there. The man considered wisest amongst the authorities had a dream and was visited by a heavenly messenger. He inquired of the angel "Who should the new Bishop be?". The angel said that if the gathered authorities would just wait by the door of the church they should select the first person named Nicholas to walk through the doors. The church authorities had their answer, and Nicholas had his miracle and was named the youngest bishop of the church ever on record.

As a young Bishop, Nicholas was fearless in his defense of the faith. He became known as an outspoken caretaker of the people of his flock and as one very close to God, due to his faith. When the citizens of Myra came to him to complain of a difficult tax burden, he approached the Emperor for relief. Constantine, who was not Christian and who had previously cast Nicholas into prison for his vigorous public defense of Christianity, wrote a decree lowering the tax due to Bishop Nicholas' pleas on behalf of the people.

Bishop Nicholas took the written decree and cast it upon the waters towards the city of Myra. Sometime later, the finance ministers from Rome met with Constantine to change his mind about the tax. Constantine called Nicholas before him and asked for the written decree back. When Nicholas declared that he had cast the decree upon the water and that the change to the law had already taken affect, Constantine did not believe him. He sent a runner to Myra who returned a few days later to confirm that all Nicholas had said was true.

Nicholas was beloved of the people of Myra for his kindness especially to children. One such deed became a legend that has survived for centuries and is celebrated even now in a variety of cultures. In his town where he was Bishop, Nicholas once gave an anonymous gift to a man with three daughters. The family was destitute of means. The custom of the time was that each daughter would need to be provided with a dowry in order to marry. Because they were poor, the father of the three daughters was contemplating selling his children into slavery.

Nicholas heard of their plight and on a dark night soon after the eldest daughter came to marrying age, he tossed a small bag of gold through an open window (and some say he tossed it down the chimney), sparing her a life of misery.

As the second daughter came of age he repeated the deed, again doing so anonymously.

As the third daughter came of age the father waited up nights to catch the gift-giver in order to express his gratitude. His persistence paid off as he caught Bishop Nicholas in the act.

This story is recounted in many lands, although some of the details change from one telling to another. Some say it was not bags of gold but rather balls of gold that Nicholas left. Some say he tossed them into the chimney where they landed in the hanging stockings or the drying shoes of the unmarried girls. That is why some, to remember this event,celebrate Christmas was an orange in the toe of a stocking.

Nicholas was known for many such deeds. Miracles were attributed to the Bishop of Myra because of his great faith.

Some were individual stories, like the man with three daughters. Others were stories of Bishop Nicholas acting on behalf of all the people. One very famous story had to do with a terrible season of famine in Myra. The drought was so bad the people there were starting to go hungry.

Bishop Nicholas approached the captains of the ships ported in Myra, for he knew the ships contained grain destined for faraway places. But the captains were reluctant to help. They were paid for full cargos and they explained to Bishop Nicholas that they had to deliver them as they received them. Nicholas promised them that if they would share but a small part from each ship, the credit they required for full delivery would be granted them. They agreed, and Nicholas took the food to the people and fed them for two years with it, even having enough left over to plant for seed when the famine passed.

But when the ships took to sea and arrived at their destinations, the captains of the ships found their holds full upon arrival and declared the event a miracle. This caused the reputation of Nicholas to spread. He became, over time, the patron saint of children, of sailors, of the unmarried, and of innocents wrongly accused or persecuted.



Another telling

Every year children across the world eagerly await the arrival of that jolly fat, red man Santa Claus. But is he real? Well, in a way, yes he is.

The Santa Claus story begins in history, around 200 CE, with a sailing ship caught in the grip a terrible storm outside the Turkish port of Myra. As cargo was being thrown overboard by a crew desperate to stop their ship being overwhelmed by the storm, someone remembered a man of God was on boar. Perhaps he could help. "Nicholas, Nicholas" went the cry. And from his cabin emerged a man with a white beard, Nicholas. Holding the rail he prayed for God's mercy. His prayer was apparently answered, for the storm died down and the ship limped into the port city of Myra.

Upon reaching dry land Nicholas made his way to the nearest church, intent on giving thanks to God for the safe passage of the ship and her crew. Unbeknown to him a group of elders were gathered in the church, seeking God's will as to whom should be appointed bishop of their city. The white bearded Nicholas was the answer to their prayers. As bishop he wore a long red robe and became known as the "Bishop of Miracles", for there were many reports of amazing answers to his prayers.

During his bishopry Nicholas was disturbed to discover many young girls were sold into life a slave prostitution if their parents were too poor to afford a marriage dowry. As he was from a wealthy family Nicholas struck upon a plan of action. He launched it one December 6th. Under the cover of darkness he secretly moved around the town, dropping small bags of gold coins through the window of homes where there was a little girl but a family too poor to afford a dowry. From that time on Nicholas would follow the same practise every December 6th. Families were relieved and elated to save their daughters from slave prostitution. It is said that one year when Nicholas reached through a window, the bag of coins fell into a stocking hanging by the fire to dry - the source of our Christmas stocking tradition.

It was not until the year of his death that people discovered who the mystery benefactor was. Five hundred years later Nicholas was made a saint by the Catholic church - thus our talk of "Saint Nicholas". As his story spread so did attempts to imitate his kindness. In the twelfth century French nuns began imitating him by taking bags of fruit and nuts to poor families every December 5 - what became known as "St Nicholas' Eve". In Russia St Nicholas became a patron saint and was celebrated every Christmas. In England he was given the name "Father Christmas", in France "Papa Noel"

In Holland St Nicholas was known as "Sinter Klass", "Sinter" meaning "Saint" and "Klass" for "Nicholas." Elsewhere those with broken English heard the story of Saint Nicholas dropping coins through windows onto the hearth and developed the into the idea of the gift-giver coming down the chimney, landing in the cinders of the fire below. So for some he became "Cinder Klaussen".

Then in 1822 Clement Moore wrote his famous poem, "The Night Before Christmas", in which the Dutch Sinter Klass became Santa Claus. He probably drew (whether directly or indirectly ) from the poet Washington Irvin who had published a book about a Dutch colonist's dream in which St. Nick came riding over the tops of trees in a wagon in which he brings yearly presents to the children.

Thomas Nash was a cartoonist for Harpers Weekly. He began drawing pictures of the figure described in Clement Moore's poem. He gave Santa Claus the red robes and white beard of the original St Nicholas, and decided to make his Santa plump and jolly. The final stage in Santa's evolution came when Coca-Cola had what is now the definitive Santa image drawn up for an advertising campaign.

So is Santa real? Yes he is...or was. And every Christmas we do well to hear his story and imitate his acts of generosity.

Source: http://www.ozsermonillustrations.com Based on a report in Austin Miles, "Santa's Surprising Origins", posted at Crosswalk.com news service December 20, 2001. Miles is a Northern California chaplain, author, award-winning writer and historian. He is listed in the International Historic Who's Who..


So famous did Nicholas become that no other name in the church, save Jesus and the Virgin Mary only, was so widely known or respected. More than 2000 churches in the Old World bore the name of Saint Nicholas. And his legend only grew as the centuries passed.

This is just the beginning of the story of Santa Claus. The genesis of the man we anticipate each Christmas came from the good Bishop of Myra -- a man in red robes, a man with a long beard, and a man known for anonymous giving -- especially to children.

Wednesday 25 November 2009

Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving or Thanksgiving Day, presently celebrated on the fourth Thursday in November, has been an annual tradition in the United States since 1863. It did not become a federal holiday until 1941. Thanksgiving was historically a religious observation to give thanks to God, but is now primarily identified as a secular holiday.

The First Thanksgiving was celebrated to give thanks to God for helping the pilgrims survive the brutal winter. The first Thanksgiving feast lasted three days providing enough food for 53 pilgrims and 90 Indians. The traditional Thanksgiving menu often features turkey, stuffing, sweet potatoes and pumpkin pie. Americans may eat these foods on modern day Thanksgiving, but the first feast did not consist of these items. On the first feast turkey was any type of fowl that the pilgrims hunted. Pumpkin pie wasn't on the menu because there were no ovens for baking, but they did have boiled pumpkin. Cranberries weren't introduced at this time. Due to the diminishing supply of flour there was no bread of any kind. The foods included in the first feast included duck, geese, venison, fish, lobster, clams, swan, berries, dried fruit, pumpkin, squash, and many more vegetables.


Further reading

http://www.csmonitor.com/2002/1127/p13s02-lign.html

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thanksgiving_%28United_States%29

Happy Thanksgiving no matter how you celebrate.

10 worst pickup lines ever


1) Did you fart? ...cuz you just blew me away.
2) Are yer parents retarded? ...cuz ya sure are special.
3) My love fer you is like diarrhea. I just can't hold it in.
4) Do you have a library card? ...cuz I'd like to sign you out
5) Is there a mirror in yer pants? ....cuz I can see myself in em..
6) You might not be the best lookin' girl here, but beauty's only a light switch away.
7) I know I'm not no Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make yer bed-rock..
8) Yer eyes are as blue as window cleaner.
9) If yer gunna regret this in the mornin, we kin sleep til afternoon.
AND.. the best for last!
10) Yer face reminds me of a wrench. Every time I think of it, my nuts tighten up.

Tuesday 24 November 2009

Southern jokes



1: What's the difference between a boyfriend and husband?

45 minutes



2:What's the fastest way to a man's heart?

Through his chest with a sharp knife.


3: What's the difference between a
southern zoo and a northern zoo?

A northern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of
the cage.
A southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of
the cage along with... 'a recipe'.

4:How do you get a sweet 80-year-old lady to say the F word?

Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!

5: What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a
southern fairytale?

A northern fairytale begins 'Once upon a time ....'

A southern fairytale begins 'Y'all ain't
gonna believe this shit


Monday 16 November 2009

Things worth my total hate filled scorn

I tried to post this on the blog spot page for 5 things i hate but it wouldn't go through for me so I'm posting it here because i feel these things are worth hating.



1. People who think there better than everyone else (we are all just people no matter what our back ground or financial status)

2. Females who pretend there more of a women than others( like they think because they wear 10 gallons of lip gloss or eat a pea at a time there more feminine)I personally think there a farce

3. Lies, liars, any thing fake! People who will sit there and lie to your face and you know there lying, you even tell them there lying and they insist there not lying!


4. People who eat meat and act like its no problem there eating the dead flesh of something that used to be just as real and alive as they are now( how would they like it if they were being killed for a stew pot?) But what really fires me up is when someone acts like an animal does not have a soul...Its obvious they have a soul you stupid cunt! You just don't want to feel guilty while you pig out on your big mac.

5.people who complain about some one not doing a good job when the person is trying as hard as they can ( you always know when some ass hole has never had to do that job because there the only one making rude comments)


People with no insight or sympathy really make me want to commit murder

Sunday 15 November 2009

Christmas



I have already got the Christmas spirit! Well ok i get it early every year, I usually have my Christmas tree up before the turkeys been carved for Thanksgiving( my tree is usually up the day after Halloween). I love all the Christmas movies and specials on tv. I Adore how every one seems a bit kinder more loving a little bit more forgiving and closer to each other. Its one of the few good things i remember from my child hood.I love winter time as well the cold beautiful snow! i love the cold i adore the snow i love every thing about this time of year! I even love giving Christmas gifts( i don't give a hoot that giving Christmas gifts can get expensive) Here's to hoping you find find your Christmas spirit too!